Desperately Seeking Splendor

I feel that our American culture has taught us to seek out positivity. Seek happiness. Joy. Wonder. Excitement. Splendor. Buy this to make your life easier. Shop here with the cool kids. One pill makes you larger, and one pill makes you small. SEXY LOCAL MILFS ARE DTF, CLICK HERE TO FUCK!!

However, at any given moment, are we really feeling anything? Are you always up or down? I hope not. What about right down the middle? The absence of an emotion, just being OK or being fine... There's nothing wrong with that. We know that, right? And if you feel down, drained, blah. Whatever you want to call it. That's OK too. It's OK to be uncomfortable. It's OK to feel awkward. Sad. Fucking depressed. Shit happens, right? These are all well within the range of everyday human emotions. However, you are not your emotions. They are just one part, out of many, that make up you.

And even if you are anxious, nervous, uneasy, etc. These are perfectly natural emotions. Assuming you believe in evolution, we evolved these emotions to be aware, to be on alert, to protect ourselves from threats, to think through plans and scenarios in case shit hits the fan, to be ready in case a bear or sabertooth tiger jumps out from the bushes. Anxiety is a great motivator. Fear reminds us of that anxiety. These emotions drive us to be mindful. It pushes you to do more. To be better. That’s all. It's up to you to find the good in it and use it to your advantage. Don’t be out to get yourself. Life has a way of doing plenty of that.

We all want to feel safe. Secure. Stable. But you must also accept that your mind evolved from millions of years of quiet fear. We have reached a point in society where we have never been safer, never more secure, never more stable. Even if you may feel America is chaotic right now, it's important to remember the context of history. If it were possible to reboot your life to any time in human history, would you really want to go back to any point in time considering the advancements in medicine, science & technology? I don't even like taking the stairs or having to stay in a hot ass room with no AC. I ain’t buildin’ no log cabin, Jack!

This is all to say, we have to be grateful for what we have within the grander context of history, where we are as a people. But we also need to be very mindful of those who are without and those who struggle within today's context.

Positivity is a concept. What makes people happy today is a total pipedream or nightmare for someone else in the course of history. Imagine transplanting some Amazon jungle tribesman to a grocery store. The man has hunted and gathered for his food everyday and now some mystery voice is booming “CLEANUP ON AISLE 4!” It’s madness. It’d be like a fever dream. He probably does not even want that in his life because he only knows what he knows.

Positivity is an umbrella term where we pack in marketing buzzwords that we’ve been told we need to feel, need to pursue. What makes me myself does not make you yourself. Only I can feel my feelings. Only I can live my life. Someone else’s ideas, products, goals, dreams are their own. Look within!

We are what we are. I am what I am. I don’t need a commercial to tell me what I want, what I need. It’s OK, my life could be better. And my idea of what I need in my life to be better might be entirely different a year from now, 5 years from now and so on. My appearance. My friends. My relationships. My jump shot. I want to be better. I want you to be better. I want all of us to be better and it’s OK if it’s not all going as planned. Maybe it’s not going how we thought it would. But we have thousands of days in our lives, knock on wood, to turn moments into memories. Memories into experiences. Experiences into lives. In the end, I hope I can be at peace with (most of) my decisions. I hope the people who matter to me and vice versa. You may be thinking “Gee, set the bar low much? Don’t you want XYZ?” It’s not about setting the bar. There is no bar.

Are you happy right now? Maybe, maybe not. Am I? Nah, not really. The better question is “WHO F’N CARES?” How were you feeling January 12, 1997? Does it matter? I rest my case.

Will we be happy in the future? Sure. We’ll feel just about everything there is to feel, whether we like it or not. It’ll all come eventually and that’s OK. Let’s get there together. Let’s simply experience all of the experiences life provides along the way.

Song of the Moment: Incubus - “Stellar”